Oh, Just Piss On Her

What is it with guys and their need to establish some sort of territory? After spending some time with Erin, I am finding that I am not making some of the people she has dated comfortable. For instance, I learned that an ex of hers didn’t like me. We’ve never even met! Why? Because Erin and I lived together. It’s been almost three years since we lived together and our relationship was totally non-sexual. In fact, sometimes it got aggravating. (Not that she’s a bad person to live with, but you inevitably find some incompatibility when living with a friend.) Apparently, I must be some kind of threat. I find it insanely amusing to think that I’m too close to “his woman.”

Now one guy had me pegged from the start—her friend Kevin. He does not see me as a threat at all. In fact, he has called me “passive.” Hmm, I’m not sure whether to be insulted by that or not. It’s largely the truth so I can’t be angry at him for that. Even though I have only met him once (seen him thrice), when I see the interaction I’ve seen between him and Erin, I think that they would be great for each other. Which would also be great for me because then I won’t be seen as a “threat.” But the situation is too complicated—even for me… so I won’t go there.

Last night though, I was hoping to go out with Season. Kevin (a different Kevin), who we were friends with in high school came up from Florida and we were hoping to get together. Really, I would like to talk to him. I haven’t seen or heard from him since graduation. And the fact that he lives an open life down in Florida is something I’d like to drill him on. But it didn’t work out.

Erin had plans that night but we worked around that so that we would go out for drinks. She had a date with a guy named Alex who was supposed to have arrived from California that night. He hadn’t shown up yet so we went to the bar by ourselves. I was having a great time until Alex showed up. Now, don’t get the wrong impression. Alex was a pretty nice guy. Very sociable. But I felt like the third wheel! Yech. So for the next couple hours we sat and chatted. Yadda, yadda, but at the end of the night he kissed Erin goodbye. It was like a peck. So I avert my eyes. Well—I’m not a perv. I look back up and I see them making out!

Now hold on just one second! It was a first date. Actually, I wouldn’t even call it a “date.” It was going to a bar, having a few drinks, and meet the “best friend.” Did I mention that there is another guy present? ME! Does anyone find that completely forward to do that? Considering how much we were making fun of the drunken guy who was all over these two girls at the bar, I think he was trying to send a message to me. “This night was about me. You were just along for the ride.”

I don’t have this problem with guy friends, quite understandably. But it’s one of my biggest fears when it comes to my gal friends. When they get into relationships, who are they going to drop when it comes down to it? Me, quite frankly. And deep down, I understand why a boyfriend or a husband will always come before me. It should be that way. But what I don’t get, is the situation of why they have to make that decision in the first place.